After several tests, the home pregnancy test and I are now friends. I find that we would have gotten to know each other better a lot  more quickly if the package contained more useful information.

How about a more useful, non-scientific FAQ, for starters?*

The package says I can use a cup for my urine when I take the test. I don’t have paper cups and using an actual cup would be gross. Any alternatives?

Use the the foil packaging that the pregnancy test stick comes in. It’s convenient, disposable, and has the added benefit of being sterile.

What’s the first thing I should do when taking a test?

Check the expiration date of the test. You won’t get accurate results if it’s expired.

What’s the second?

Read the instructions carefully. You would be surprised how different brands have different methods of use.

I don’t feel like peeing. What should I do?

Drink warm water. Juice also works. For some reason, I find that cold water just refreshes me. It doesn’t really make me want to pee.

There’s a super faint line. What does that mean?

It could mean that the test is expired. It could also mean that the pregnancy is too early for the test to detect fully. Take another test one or two days later.

How many tests can I take before I start looking like a crazy person?

Four is a good number.

*Again, this is a non-scientific, non-medical, non-research based list. This is purely based on my personal experience. If you think you’re pregnant, congratulations! Now go see a doctor.