marriage

Day 298: Rare Appearances and Close Encounters

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I’ve actually been on bed rest for a couple months now due to some precautions my doctor wants me to take. The little one is way too excited to come out into the world and meet everyone. (Patience should be lesson number one, it seems.) With work out of the question and long car rides discouraged, I’m pretty much the Loch Ness of my circle. My outings are rare and very, very brief.

Yesterday was one of those times that I made the effort to go somewhere. I was under a cloud from being cooped up for such a long time and I wanted to support my husband who was bringing a married couple to speak at his work. In a nutshell, I’m glad I did. I may have developed a couple-crush on them.

My husband and I are really the first ones in our circle of friends to get married. Although we still enjoy being with our single friends, it’s not always easy to stay connected.  The schedules don’t match, the choice of what makes for interesting conversation changes, and priorities shift. I’m learning that these differences are part of the realities of marriage.

This is why I thought meeting that couple was so refreshing. They have been married for much longer and are parents to a young boy.  They are so respectful and affectionate with each other. It was also obvious that they prioritize their family. Those are characteristics that my husband and I are continuously working on to develop and maintain in our own marriage. I felt like I was drinking in all their stories on marriage and child-rearing. I was so obviously thrilled to meet them that it was embarrassing.

One of things the most striking things they mentioned was how they spend their anniversaries. They write down the things that they are thankful for and what they can improve on. Isn’t that a wonderful idea? It so simple but seems like it would be so effective. It would be lovely to look back at how far the marriage has journeyed 10, 15, or even 50 years later since it’s all written down. My husband and I celebrated our first year anniversary a few weeks ago and we’re planning on doing this very, very soon.

To those who are married or are in serious relationships, what’s the most practical tip you have ever received?